You miss 100% of the shirts you don’t wear.
Check out that goddamn shirt. It’s beautiful. Not since 1990 when I owned this piece of shit below have I wanted to wear Wayne’s face on my tender, soft torso.
Moving on from my beautifully supple torso… here are the best Gretzky shirts around or not depending on your inability to make good decisions.
1) 1995/96 Throwback Alternate Authentic Vintage Jersey ($299.99)
This one is actually for sale at the NHL Shop. Don’t buy it.
2) Wayne Gretzky Campbell Conference NHL All Star CCM Jersey ($50)
You’re allowed to buy this. It’s fuckin’ dope. Imagine walking around with all those stars on you.
3) Gretzky Military Jersey that’s for Sale ($35.99)
No shit it’s for sale. It’s camo. Nobody could see you wearing it.
4) Vintage Wayne Gretzky LA Kings T-shirt ($30)
You’ve probably bought dumber shit than this.
5) Canada Cup Jersey
I don’t know how Aliexpress works. You buy it from here at a fraction of the cost and you get mailed panda bones?
And in closing, Kobe’s got a Gretzky jersey out there on ebay somewhere.